please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
please don't ironically join a cult
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