She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize
