K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
