i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize