4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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