I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
