That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
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Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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