no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
