Porn is love you can see.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
There r osticjed everywhere
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Randomize
