did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
