Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?

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  (818): Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess? http://tfl.nu/uim6
  Replies (5) Good night (1079) Bad night (561)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...

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  (407): i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star... http://tfl.nu/jbo8
  Replies (534) Good night (135837) Bad night (6477)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole

  (425): View more from Washington

  There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian

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  (206): I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole (425): There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian http://tfl.nu/pttl
  Replies (98) Good night (2761) Bad night (24295)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."

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  (847): after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit." http://tfl.nu/sc5b
  Replies (15) Good night (946) Bad night (7086)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?

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  (781): There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours? http://tfl.nu/3112
  Replies (2) Good night (3458) Bad night (752)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.

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  (940): This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying. http://tfl.nu/0zt5
  Replies (2) Good night (752) Bad night (1080)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.

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  (+44): I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring. http://tfl.nu/y78v
  Replies (8) Good night (714) Bad night (1412)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.

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  (480): She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress. http://tfl.nu/19rj
  Replies (4) Good night (687) Bad night (1387)
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  (819): View more from Quebec

  I have grass duct taped all over my body

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  (819): I have grass duct taped all over my body http://tfl.nu/3nqm
  Replies (2) Good night (1023) Bad night (664)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?

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  (309): Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else? http://tfl.nu/zqde
  Replies (5) Good night (821) Bad night (444)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.

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  (407): I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter. http://tfl.nu/mj4q
  Replies (2) Good night (751) Bad night (415)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see

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  (201): I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see http://tfl.nu/49ut
  Replies (0) Good night (614) Bad night (330)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  We're showing the video later bring pizza

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  (919): i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF (1-919): We're showing the video later bring pizza http://tfl.nu/1zdw
  Replies (2) Good night (867) Bad night (300)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.

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  (479): Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual. http://tfl.nu/o63s
  Replies (2) Good night (438) Bad night (708)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?

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  (318): What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church? http://tfl.nu/g4ep
  Replies (9) Good night (1182) Bad night (356)

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