yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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