Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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