I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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