i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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