are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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