Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
