my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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