grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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