I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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