Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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