I don't think brook has ever known best
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
