drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
