i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
