Taylor Swift is so right about you.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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