Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
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