Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
