This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
