We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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