Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
4 words: hood of his car
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Randomize