got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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