So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
