the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I need moral support for this bender
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
