Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
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