Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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