Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
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Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
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So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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