i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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