but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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