It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
