So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
