Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
