Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
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I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
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you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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