New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
