i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
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