party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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