My hand turned me down
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.