we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.