SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i just sent this text using only my big toe
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Blood and glitter go together right?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Randomize
