Can Purell be used as lube?
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
