i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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