dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
