I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
