I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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